Choose Your Own Zucchini

Don’t let The Pope tell you how to garden!

He is completely out of touch with modern horticultural trends.

In the dark ages*, when people planted tomatoes, they reaped tomatoes.

Vegetables were assigned biologically based labels.

Oppressive, bigoted, biological labels.

Apparently, The Pope still lives in the dark ages.

A vegetable growing on a tomato vine isn’t ALWAYS a tomato.

Plants are more than their physical make-up.

So much more.

I have the right to decide for myself which vegetables I’m growing.

My garden, my choice.

Small minded bigots WILL NOT define my zucchini for me!

I’m so open-minded, I grow pumpkins on corn stalks.

I grow carrots on apple trees.

I’ve even got a chicken that lays watermelon.

I’m free from the stifling affects of logic.

Reality is whatever ‘feels right’.

It’s very freeing!

I’m choosing the vegan life-style now!

(What some call ‘pork chops’, I call ‘kale’.)

I eat whatever I want and STILL feel morally superior to everyone else.

Including the Pope!

The tidal wave of anti-intellectualism raging across America isn’t all bad.

I’m gonna feel really good about myself as I drown.


 

*I choose to define the  ‘dark ages’ as ‘all times before today’.

3 thoughts on “Choose Your Own Zucchini

  1. Sunny says:

    And the funniest post award goes to…..John Branyan! He receives a free chilli-bearing strawberry plant and pair of *novelty sunglasses!

    *frames not included

    We really do have to laugh about this stuff otherwise we’ll die crying!!!

  2. Matthew Cross says:

    Good for you, John. Nice to know that your corn is sweet, your apple trees are well-rooted, and even your chickens are bearing good fruit!
    ( Just don’t hog the kale, okay)

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